ITALIAN IN NEW YORK
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One day ima gonna America to bigga hotel. 

Inna morning I go down to eata breakfast. I tella waitress I wan two pissa 
toast. She bring only one piss. I tella her I wan two piss. She say go to 
the toilet. I say you no understand, I wan two piss onna ma plate. She say 
you better no piss onna plate you dirty sonna ma bitch. I don even know 
lady and she calla me dirty sonna ma bitch. 

Later I is goin to eat at the bigga restaurant. Waitress she bringa me 
spoon and knife but no fock. I tella her I wan fock. She tella me everyone 
wan fock. I tella her - you no understand. I wan fock on table. She say you 
better no fock on table you dirty sonna ma bitch. 

So I gonna back ma room inna hotel and ah finda there no shits onna ma bed. 
So I calla manager and tella him I wan shit. He tell me go to the toilet. 
I say - you no understand, I wan shit onna ma bed. He say you better no 
shit onna bed, you dirty sonna ma bitch. 

After I goin to the checkout and man at desk he say: 'Peace on you.' 
I say, piss on you too, you sonna ma bitch, I gonna back to Italy pronto!